Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
