i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize