I'll bet she douches with gravy.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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