omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
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