i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize