just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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