im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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