I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Damn victory sex feels great
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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