rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
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