i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
We need to rekindle our bromance
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
