I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
