i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
