he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
