Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
that's an acceptable place to lick
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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