Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I came so hard my ears popped.
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