you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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