so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I have fence marks all over my body
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize