He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize