I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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