before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
should my penis look like a turkey
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
