North Korea, Best Korea!
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
