Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (857): Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?! http://tfl.nu/m6me
  Replies (15) Good night (613) Bad night (1289)
• Favorite

  (421): View more from

  And she was only 16?

  (1-421): View more from

  You say that like it's a bad thing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (421): And she was only 16? (1-421): You say that like it's a bad thing. http://tfl.nu/zexo
  Replies (30) Good night (3342) Bad night (1471)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (559): yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate http://tfl.nu/yink
  Replies (8) Good night (2096) Bad night (652)
• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (863): I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm. http://tfl.nu/3uu7
  Replies (27) Good night (2144) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread. http://tfl.nu/pzp6
  Replies (22) Good night (5931) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex http://tfl.nu/fw26
  Replies (12) Good night (5299) Bad night (1024)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward.. http://tfl.nu/92jg
  Replies (19) Good night (4659) Bad night (1329)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway http://tfl.nu/al82
  Replies (15) Good night (3729) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts. http://tfl.nu/2tox
  Replies (11) Good night (6459) Bad night (1346)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive. http://tfl.nu/o6oy
  Replies (6) Good night (4069) Bad night (1356)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized... http://tfl.nu/nrq1
  Replies (13) Good night (1822) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this http://tfl.nu/2qka
  Replies (2) Good night (1449) Bad night (740)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome. http://tfl.nu/u2pl
  Replies (5) Good night (1598) Bad night (619)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park." http://tfl.nu/6eh6
  Replies (9) Good night (1215) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick

  (1-714): View more from California

  Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick (1-714): Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!! http://tfl.nu/q4sd
  Replies (3) Good night (1553) Bad night (403)

Randomize