Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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