You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
