He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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