he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
