$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
tell me about the eggs
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