Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
