She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
