He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
