okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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