If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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