Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
wow bdsm is so cute
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
