i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
