Christians are straight up FREAKS
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
