Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
