if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
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It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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