Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Randomize
