I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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