Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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