i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize