This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
