yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
