There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Duck Duck Cougar?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize