i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
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