hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize
