It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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