Texts From Last Night

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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  video games are the ultimate cock blocker

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  (781): video games are the ultimate cock blocker http://tfl.nu/a2qu
  Replies (42) Good night (792) Bad night (4018)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.

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  (440): he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life. http://tfl.nu/ggva
  Replies (14) Good night (8488) Bad night (960)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..

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  (952): Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day.. http://tfl.nu/4gef
  Replies (25) Good night (3775) Bad night (1319)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.

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  (519): and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover. http://tfl.nu/uo1b
  Replies (9) Good night (6637) Bad night (1486)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.

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  (541): I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples. http://tfl.nu/kf5x
  Replies (17) Good night (3784) Bad night (885)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas

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  (208): Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas http://tfl.nu/3mqp
  Replies (7) Good night (4013) Bad night (749)
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  (516): View more from New York

  PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.

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  (516): PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated. http://tfl.nu/z915
  Replies (4) Good night (1368) Bad night (474)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.

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  (832): Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories. http://tfl.nu/6x0g
  Replies (1) Good night (2041) Bad night (547)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.

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  (919): Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy. http://tfl.nu/xqei
  Replies (11) Good night (3496) Bad night (639)
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  (818): View more from California

  Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20

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  (818): Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20 http://tfl.nu/6e47
  Replies (2) Good night (1174) Bad night (354)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.

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  (519): he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint. http://tfl.nu/fup1
  Replies (4) Good night (1230) Bad night (474)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?

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  (906): does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex? http://tfl.nu/8dql
  Replies (2) Good night (492) Bad night (359)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.

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  (662): He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it. http://tfl.nu/e1a5
  Replies (5) Good night (1040) Bad night (192)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening

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  (716): Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening http://tfl.nu/obf8
  Replies (4) Good night (246) Bad night (417)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm

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  (647): Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm http://tfl.nu/f115
  Replies (5) Good night (433) Bad night (235)

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