you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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