Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
