Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
