I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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