Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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